Alexander makes cock of himself

Mmm, egg and watercrest, my favourite

Mmm, egg and watercrest, my favourite

DANNY Alexander has made a complete cock of himself, say experts.

The LibDem MP and Chief Ginger to the Treasury was yesterday snapped holding aloft a yellow briefcase and pretending he was just about to do a budget.

“There wasn’t a hint of irony about the whole thing,” political analyst Jennifer Sharp said. “There he was, standing on the steps of the Treasury with this stupid yellow case someone actually spent time knocking up.

“And he was expecting the press to take him seriously, but they were all, like, ‘Danny! Danny! What’s in the case – your sandwiches!

“I mean, no one thought it possible, but he’s managed to make the LibDems look even more ridiculous.”

Mr Alexander is facing a battle to hold onto his seat in Inverness, Nairn, Badenoch and Strathspey. Voters in the Highland city were less than impressed with his performance.

“It was a bit like a little boy pushing a toy lawnmower around the garden as his dad worked with the real thing,” one voter said.

“Aye, he looked a total twat,” said another.

When asked about the LibDem’s farcical attempt to get publicity, David Cameron said: “Ha! Ha-ha,ha,ha,ha,ha, ha,ha,ha.”

Labour leader Ed Miliband added: “Ha, ha, ha!”

LibDem leader Nick Clegg insisted the yellow case idea had nothing to do with him.

“All my attention right now if focussed on the big event coming up in a few weeks time – the new series of Game of Thrones. It’s going to be epic.”

 

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