THE Mirror phone hacking trial has sensationally collapsed after the judge ruled that on balance it had done more good than harm.
The judge, Mr Justice Smithers, threw out the case yesterday moments after actor Steve McFadden had given his testimony. The EastEnders actor claimed stories published in the newspaper destroyed his relationship with co-star Lucy Benjamin.
Mr Justice Smithers appeared to sigh deeply then told the High Court: “Fuck this. I have come to the conclusion, that, yes, phone hacking has caused some discomfort to an assortment of Britain’s brain-dead celebrities, philandering sports stars and self-obsessed luvvies and lefties.
“But you have to weigh that against the schadenfreude millions of ordinary people have experienced when reading these stories. Would we deny them that just to protect the so-called ‘privacy’ of a bunch of media whores and attention-seeking jizzmonkeys?
“Also if it has denied Steve McFadden the chance to mate, that’s got to be a good thing, right?”