WEETABIX soaked in milk then spilled by a messy little brat and left to dry has greater adhesive properties than most super glues, a new study has shown.
Scientist and father-of-three Brian McKinley launched the study three months ago after a particularly chaotic breakfast.
He said: “As usual, the little shits had spilled stuff everywhere but I was on the school run and didn’t have time to clean up. When I got back home I found what I thought was concrete on one of the work surfaces, but soon I realised it was dried Weetabix. After 15 minutes of scrubbing the substance was still stubbornly fastened to our lovely oak worktop and I though, hey, there’s a study in this.”
Dr McKinley spent weeks in the lab comparing the ‘stickability’ of dried Weetabix with 100 of the leading super glue brands.
“It was amazing,” Dr McKinley said, “Weetabix outperformed the lot.”
He now plans to launch a new product called ‘Weetastix’.
“It will primarily be targeted at the building trade as an alternative, all-natural mortar,” he revealed.
“The market for eco-homes is booming so I expect Weetastix will soon be the go-to for all the sector’s adhesive needs. Then I can make a packet, divorce the wife and move to the south of France.”